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Top 10 Worst Types of People
As the readership of Old-Wizard knows, we have gripes with many different types of people. The most often cited people who we dislike are the Sega-heads who consistently claim that the Sega Genesis was better than the SNES. We have addressed this numerous times throughout many of our articles (top 5 worst video game websites), but we also gave them their due in our “top 5 best Sega games of all time“. What the Old-Wizard reader may not know though is that we have a lot of heat for more than just the Sega-head. We come across people every day that make us ask ourselves “Why do we have to live in this time”? While this may seem like too much of a gloomy disposition on our part, it is not without reason that certain people just tend to piss us off. We’ll go through these “types” in this list. We just hope that you’re not one of them!
10. People who try to defend the Sega Genesis over the SNES
We’ve had numerous encounters with these people throughout Old-Wizard history, yet they never seem to give up. The Sega lovers continually try to defend Sega over the SNES with Sonic and Shining Force as their main arguments as to why the Genesis was better. All the while they don’t realize the greatness of games like Illusion of Gaia, Secret of Evermore, and the Donkey Kong series. We don’t know if the Sega lovers just like taking the underdog’s side, or if they just like bad games. Is there ever point where they will give up their attachment to sub-par video games? From our experience, not in this lifetime. We do like Toe Jam and Earl though. Sega-heads never talk about this game though. This is curious as its one of the few good games for the system.
9. People who think the latest Star Wars movies were good
Some Star Wars fans just won’t admit that the latest Star Wars movies were dung. They can’t admit that the characters employed by Lucas in the prequel trilogy were geared more towards garnering a wider audience rather then being created for the loyal follower. These movies get boring after the first 30 minutes, and all the special effects and CGI do nothing to save the below average acting and even worse writing. The populace current that resides throughout these movies hinders the experience that we once gained through the original movies, where passion and purpose were the main expression of Lucas and Co. Some people get too attached to who they recognize when something is shit. These Star Wars fans piss us off.8. Bands who allow magazine writers to make them hold beer cans in photo shoots
We can understand why magazine publishers and writers want pictures of bands that look like they’re wasted. This modern culture that prides itself on the imperative to enjoy is a signifier for these publishers to try to find these bands. But what band who really cared about its music would allow some cameraman to make them put a beer can in their hand during a photo shoot? You see this all the time too. Check out an edition of NME or Alternative Press and you’ll see what we mean. They are being forced to look like they’re having a fun time. This party rock attitude first stemmed from 60’s excess and the Stones imagery. While they came across as genuine in their hedonistic lifestyle, these new bands look like their trying to hard, and their music suffers for it. Take a closer look at the pictures and the music these bands play and you will see how shit they are.
7. People who tie their hopes to a politician
During this political season especially, people have tied their dreams to certain politicians to a sickening extent. All these canards of “hope and change” from these candidates are nothing but rhetoric founded in Greek sophistry. Man is responsible for himself. When things are going shit, its up to them to change their own outcome. No grandiose sounding politician is going to change anything for you. Sure, they may fool you into thinking everything is going to be great after they’re elected, but these promises usually end up as being empty speeches given in desperate attempts for power and recognition. Going to one of these political rallies is nothing but bread and circuses. People cheer like it’s a high school pep rally. Man doesn’t evolve with age. They just displace their immaturity to more commonly accepted social acts.
6. People who don’t appreciate 16 bit gaming
We consistently hear from people that our tastes on video games are too retro. While this was the point of the website to begin with, this isn’t the only reason why someone saying this would anger us. 16 bit gaming was the best era of video games of all time. It was the height of RPG’s, it was the introduction to the greatest video game system of all time in the SNES (which we cover in the top 10 video game systems of all time list). It was where we were introduced to Mario Kart. It’s where the greatest rivalry in gaming history happened between Sega and the SNES. In terms of quality of games, the best came from the 16 bit era. Who could argue against Secret of Mana, Final Fantasy 3, and Mario Kart as some of the greatest games of all time? Surely, games will advance in graphics and technology, but they will never have the soul and story lines of the 16-bit era.
5. Business Suit-Wearers
These sons-of-a-bitches are the most arrogant bastards you can ever encounter. The dress they wear symbolizes some significance for others in society when all they are is a bunch of middle-men talking with other middle-men about middle-men issues. They never produced anything of any significance in their life. All they are good for is “talking to people”. They hire people to do jobs they can’t do but yet are respected in most peoples’ eyes because of how they dress. It’s the manufacturer and laborer though who are in the grind producing what these middle men use for a “career”. Call us purist Faux-Saints in the style of St. Wittgenstein, but we think these people need to come back down to the ground to work in the soil they came from. It’s the height of arrogance to be self-satisfied because you wear professional dress.4. People who drink a beer with one hand and have their other hand in their pocket with their belly out
Are these people not the most irritating people on the face of this planet? You see these types at generic family parties being so self-satisfied with themselves that it makes you want to vomit. Their banal $50,000 a year jobs make them feel entitled to pose in these relaxed positions throughout the duration of these dry events. They have nothing to talk about except subjects as boring as sports and how their slow-moving non-risk-taking stocks are going. They always have a tucked in collared shirt on and wear khakis with a black belt on. These people are the epitome of a self satisfied culture that sees the best of itself in a boring job with an average salary. God help anyone who has to be in a conversation with these soporific agents of humanity.
3. People who wear tight jeans and like Indie music
Scene-sters is what we could appropriately call these people. They stand outside clubs looking like storks in tight jeans and tight t-shirts that usually have some retro product brand on their shirt. They don’t know much about anything, nor like anything in particular besides fitting into a group of people who can’t fit in anywhere else. They look like morons to everyone else except the other morons who look like them who don’t even notice them because they’re too involved noticing their own image. This waste of time pisses us off because it’s a waste of humanity. Instead of standing outside a shit-hole pretending to be punk, they could be working on figuring out a Wittgenstein mind problem or writing inventive pieces on Husserlian scholarship…or they could simply be playing a video game. Fortunately for us at Old-Wizard, we haven’t had to experience these types in the past year because we have all moved away from the city where these buffoons generally roam.
2. Super-Religious types
The super-religious types can be just as annoying as anyone else on this list. We don’t dislike everyone who’s religious, just the real fanatics (Christian or Muslim). Their heights of hubris are on par with the business suit wearer. Always the jurors of proper conduct, these idiots will condemn someone at the slightest falsehood of action, or their perception of a falsehood. These people supposedly never sin, or if they do, they repent their sins to God and are forever forgiven, making them able to sin every second of the day as long as they “repent” for their sins later at night. My, how convenient religion has become for a liaise-faire society who has no time for any real spiritual practice. Don’t confuse the Super-Religious type though with the true believer. The true believer wouldn’t go out of his way to let everyone know about his spirituality and conviction in something greater than himself. Like most people on this list, the super-religious type is in need of an identity, and in this case, its to supplement their inner fear of what is other than themselves.
1. Bohemian Liberals
The bohemian liberals are numerous in type. Mostly you’ll see them on college campuses with people who have no identity so they need to find it in some fake political reality that they conjure up through the internet and by reading an introduction to a Chomsky book. They look and smell bad. They think peace is something that can actually be achieved by humanity. They erroneously mistake Jesus’s parables of individual pacifism for a large scale call for peace. They listen to alternative music and sit on street corners with signs protesting something no one cares about, showing that they don’t really care about changing anything, except their own identity devoid of anything substantial. It’s these people that need a healthy dose of Homeric storytelling and Machiavellian politics to smash their idealistic and limited notions of humanity into the ashes where they came from. You will encounter this type of person at one point in your life. The key is to never listen to a word they say.
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March 15th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
Are you singing Idlewild lyrics? I hope so.
March 15th, 2010 at 3:25 pm
Not sure how this post turned into a discussion about whether America or Russia is currently the world’s most dangerous imperialist power, but I guess that’s what makes OW so great.
And Chris let’s not leave the British Empire out of the discussion. I think you guys should stop repressing Saint Helena Island.
March 15th, 2010 at 3:27 pm
Isn’t she married to Tim Burton now?
March 15th, 2010 at 6:55 pm
This article is a load of crap and will anger a lot of people like me, yes I am a sega fan and no not everything in that list was true and not snes is not better then the sega it’s the other way around. How dare this article be biast to people thats just wrong I hate this site and will no longer come here good day to you all.
March 15th, 2010 at 9:27 pm
I dislike you for acknowledging the term “Bohemian” as a fashion trend without putting quotations around it since it is absurd that Bohemian is even used to describe a lifestyle when Bohemia was once a country; use gypsy or psuedo hippie or something else…
Bohemia was a country, and this website is too intelligible to use Bohemian inappropriately.
You should dislike the people that use the term Bohemian as a fashion statement. That is supposing that one could be a Turkish Liberal or be part of a Slavic Hipster fad.
March 15th, 2010 at 11:32 pm
Mike:
Stop being so Catalonian.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:26 pm
This is hands down the best thing I’ve ever read. It’s like you pulled these right out of my head.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:35 pm
Reading this list has completely changed my opinion of you guys. I may go back through your older lists now with a different mindset. Nice work.
March 15th, 2010 at 7:27 pm
How about this list INSTEAD?:
Murderers
Pedophiles
Racists
Terrorists
Republicans
Thieves
Rapists
Warlords
Christian Fundamentalists
Islamic Fundamentalists
March 15th, 2010 at 9:54 pm
3 things for those critisizing the list:
1) it’s called satire. you know, humor?
2) the only time politicians affect people is when they either don’t do anything, or do the wrong thing (like lower taxes and increase spending (GOP), or raise taxes and spending(Dems), or when they enact socialist policies (Obama)).
3) FREE SPEECH!!!!! I’m going to assume that you’ve all heard of it, and that you don’t believe that the 1st Ammendment doesn’t only apply to you.
now please, get a sense of humor and get over yourself.
March 15th, 2010 at 10:03 pm
Couldn’t agree with Josh more. Guys, this isn’t the New York Times…Its a BLOG. A pretty non-serious blog at that. If you’ve ever visited this site before you would know when you saw the title of this post not to expect serious answers to be anywhere NEAR it. If I had seen DMB Fan’s list a couple comments above mine instead of the OldWizard’s list, I probably wouldn’t visit this site again. Also, what the fuck kind of name is that? Dave Matthew’s Fan?!? I think you clicked on the wrong link. This isn’t Old-White-Hat-Wearing-Preppy-Hippy… It’s Old-Wizard. Thankfully.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:22 am
Cool list. I completely agree with it.
March 15th, 2010 at 2:20 pm
This might be the first list to include ‘business suit wearers’ and ‘beer drinking belly out relatives’ as part of their top 10 most disliked people. It might even be the first time these people were ever included on any top 10 list at all. So congratulations on your strange aversions. IF you guys ever got boring and started writing generic obvious lists, then you’d just suck in a very average and dull way, which is probably the worst way to suck. It’s refreshing to read something less obvious and more humourous. You guys are a fun bunch of weirdos. Love you the way you are, don’t change.
March 15th, 2010 at 9:11 pm
“We don’t know if the Sega lovers just like taking the underdogs side, or they just like games that are worse than what they could be playing? Is there ever point where they will give up their attachment to sub-par video games? From our experience, not in this lifetime. We do like Toe Jam and Earl though. Sega-heads never talk about this game though. This is curious as its one of the few good games for the system.”
“6. People who don’t appreciate 16 bit gaming”
lol.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:38 am
I’ll fully admit to hating some of these people.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:41 am
btw I think its hilarious that Courtney called this list “dangerous” as if its a threat to national security. LOL.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:43 am
How about people who listen to music they don’t really like just to fit into a particular scene?
March 15th, 2010 at 12:48 am
Couldn’t agree more with most of these picks…But people who don’t appreciate the 16-bit era? Sorry but I haven’t really run into too many of those people on the streets.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:48 am
That’s because they’re not on the streets. They are mainly found on rooftops.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:56 am
“The sad thing is, the first few items in this list were funny. Light frothy stuff, perfect for a quick laugh. But then came the bitterness, and ill-informed political statements. There’s nothing funny about a right-winger trying to disguise their predjudice and fear of change as humor.”
Chris: Have you ever visited this site before this post? I’ve come to expect bitterness, ill-informed opinions and prejudice from this site.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:58 am
You forgot “People Who Continue to Try to Stir Up Console Wars that Have Been Over With For Almost a Decade”.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:42 am
Oh yeah, Aaron, i agree with u about ‘work day go by faster…’. My work days are too.
March 15th, 2010 at 6:47 pm
youre Blog Carnival article submission linked here:
http://megasizzle.com/uncategorized/links-to-the-best-megasizzle-blog-carnival-submissions/
March 15th, 2010 at 4:12 am
More people to dislike:
People who when speaking constantly use the word “like”, interrupted occasionally by a spoken brain fart in the vein of “uhhh…” or “you know”.
People who suffer from depression. Yeah, we all know the world sucks and everything is hopeless. Now let’s all stop what we’re doing to notice how sad YOU are, you narcissistic fuck.
People who are children. Not all children, but most of them are little shits. Today some shitfuck neighbors kids came upstairs by my apartment to tattle on my five year old for calling them “losers”. I felt a strong urge to push these kids down the stairs for wasting two minutes of my life. (And I was proud of my kid for calling them “losers”.)
People on myspace. Yes, we understand you work out. Thanks for all the shirtless pictures. You’re, like, totally hot. Also, OMG the pics of you and all your friends drinking BEER and LIQUOR! You guys are so crazy, and presumably fun to be around as well!
People who offer to “let you borrow” stuff, then weeks later return to ask you for an inconvenient favor since they let you borrow their PS2, guitar, Simpsons DVD collection, etc.
People who hate their jobs and are intent on reminding everyone of this. It sucks that you hate your job, because everyone else really LOVES theirs.
Wow… I could go on all day. Good article!
March 15th, 2010 at 3:26 pm
Amazing article. I like ther category “Bohemian Liberal”. Ha. You guys think a lot
March 15th, 2010 at 5:18 am
This website continues to drag me into the depths of madness with their inane list-making, yet for some reason I continue to flip through the pages looking for that article covering the top 5 worst systems of all time so that I may properly unleash the fury.
March 15th, 2010 at 1:21 am
About #10: What about people who like Nintendo and Sega equally? I’m just asking you because I am one of those people. I love the Game Boy and Game Gear equally. I love the Super Nintendo and Sega Genesis equally. I thought they both did really well during the 16-bit era.
March 15th, 2010 at 11:06 am
Old-Wizard is the best site EVAR!!!
March 15th, 2010 at 1:19 am
I fucking hate you guys, but this is your best article.
March 15th, 2010 at 10:35 pm
The 16-bit generation was when action games were at their peak, not RPGs.
I’m glad you put Sega-fans on the list, but there is a different reason why I don’t like them. I myself personally like the games on the Sega Genesis but I also like the games on the Super Nintendo also. Sega fanboys always start stupid flame wars where blabber on bullshit and bullshit about how the Sega Genesis is so much better than the Super Nintendo, it makes me want to puke.
It also bothers me that the Super Nintendo fanboys always make thier posts all whimpy whimpy whimpy. Why talk about how much you love crappy overrated games like Final Fantasy and Chrono Trigger if you know Sega fanboys are just make fun of you.
Talk about all the cool games on the Super Nintendo like Space Megaforce, Cybernator, Sparkster, Wild Gun, Smash TV, ect, and they’ll see the Super Nintendo isn’t the whimpy system everybody including Wikipedia makes it out to be.
The entire 16-bit generation is misrepresented on the internet, just because all the cool people who played games to have fun, all were smart and got jobs and had girlfriends, while only the stupid nerds who only played games for graphics, and liked faggot games like Final Fantasy and Chrono Trigger, just because they like the music having realistic instraments, and they have NO taste in melody or even if the instraments nomatter how bad the actual music is.
I actually like video game music sounding synthesized, because if I want to hear real music I listen to the radio, when I want to listen to fake music, I listen to video game music. I listen to video game music wanting it to be video game music, and when video game music sounds realistic, I’m unsatisfied because I didn’t get video game music like I wanted.
There is also more to good music than just realism. There is melody and there is the “prettiness” of the instrament and how well it fits into the melody. I have to say this loud and clear REALISTIC INSTRAMENTS AREN’T ALWAYS THE PRETTIEST INSTRUMENTS!!!!!!! I’m tired of keeping it in and I know I’m going to be flamed by idiot gamers but it is true. I’m tired of stupid geeks blabber about video game music, pretending they are music experts, when their not even interested in the music anyway, and only the “sound quality” of the music.
And what’s all this crap about nerds liking video games. Everybody keeps embarrassing themselves on the internet thinking it’s funny, but I find it depressing and sometimes uncomfortable. I like video games, but I don’t look like that. I have a lot of friends at school, but sometimes my friends can’t hang out all the time, so I still have a lot of free-time. I myself has a life, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have any spare time to waste by playing video games.
Back to the 16-bit generation being misrepresented on the internet. Everybody is so retardedly stupid that they can’t remember their childhood of playing videogames at all, and only know things about the 16-bit generation entirely from what they read. Just because you here something on game websites like GameFags doesn’t mean they’re true.
That’s what I’ve been keeping in my mind about the internet for several years and I HAD to let it all out.
March 15th, 2010 at 7:37 am
Top person I hate.
1) Old Wizard.
You guys are honestly the worst people out there.
To say a man with a business suit is a bad type of person is an invalid arguement.
Have you ever heard of murders, terrorists, people who use distortion.
You have nothing better to say, then rant about normal individuals in soceity.
And if this article was suppose to be funny. Sorry I missed the point.
March 15th, 2010 at 10:16 am
I think this is a great list. I don’t agree with the business suit thing because FBI agents wear business suits and the do actually do something of value. Other than that you’re pretty much right. Bohemian liberals disgust me with their stupidity, especially how they pretend to be the smartest people when in actuality they’re quite the opposite.
March 15th, 2010 at 3:23 am
Sega Genesis was a solid system in it’s own right with plenty of good games. SNES just had more.
March 15th, 2010 at 1:38 am
Id’ve responded earlier, but I’m dealing with what is most likely bronchitis.
Everything you posted here is true, but Phantom Menace and Revenge of the Sith while not great movies, were some of the most fun I’ve ever had in a theater. Even Attack of the Clones, the only one of the films that has more problems that redeeming qualities, was a lot of fun seeing at the end.
They have many problems, and aren’t at the original films level, but they weren’t that, bad. I know that I saw them through different eyes than either of you, but I’ll maintain that stance. You may begin throwing things.
The Matrix sequels, and Alien 3 & 4 however are abominations!
March 15th, 2010 at 3:50 am
I have to say Im shocked you put super religeous on #2. Seriously wth.
March 15th, 2010 at 12:06 am
The problem with OW is that it recycles throughout their lists the same arguments. It’s like if they want to brainwash me.
Im aking a list of “You know you are reading OW” because you will always read, no matter what they are talking about, that:
Mario is a god
MArio 3 is the best game
Metroid has the best bosses
Final fantasy 3 and secret of mana were on SNES
New games with good graphics are FPS and they suck
Attack anything that is new
And that they have the ability to see the future because:
“Surely, games will advance in graphics and technology, but they will never have the soul and story lines of the 16-bit era.”
HOW DO YOU KNOW??? it’s like if Atari people would have said back in the day “no matter how good in graphics and storyline would get that NES thing, they will never have the soul of the Atari.”
March 15th, 2010 at 4:20 pm
im starting to dig the new look old-chubby.com. would like to see new material go along with it
March 15th, 2010 at 10:55 am
i can understand som1 liking sega over snes:Sonic, Goldenaxe, Toejam and Earl, Shining Force, Vectorman, Streets of Rage, Castlevania:Bloodlines, Phantasy Star Online, Sonic 2, Ecco, and the Sonic & Knuckles cart, I prefer the SNES, but I like SEGA also.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:40 pm
Damn this fucking list was hilarious. This site rocks.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:50 pm
This website is asanine.
March 15th, 2010 at 11:53 am
(I agree about super-religious types though.
March 15th, 2010 at 1:50 am
This was hilarious
March 15th, 2010 at 3:21 am
What about people who like the SNES and the Sega Genesis equally? I think they’re both good systems with really good games.
March 15th, 2010 at 6:33 am
I like this, I like it. aside from all of the pseudo-intellectualism, it’s a good list of goodness.
March 15th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
Should’ve put English people at #1.
March 15th, 2010 at 4:27 am
I agree with this list almost wholeheartedly, actually. Except for two things:
1: Sure the SNES kills Genesis. But the Genesis had some awesome games and any system with awesome games is at least deserving of that defense.
2: The first two prequel Star Wars movies were garbage. But Revenge of the Sith had more depth and emotional complexity than any other movie in the series this side of Empire. It’s a vastly underrated movie at a time when it became cool to just lump all 3 prequel movies together rather than take the time to judge them on their individual merits.