• Mail Bag: December 15th, 2008

  

  Written by destructomaximo 17 Comments
  Last Updated:: December 15, 2008

  This week DestructoMaximo answers a lengthy email from one of our long time readers, Vintage Junkie:

  I guess I’m in the minority, but I personally love the music articles you guys write. You’re Top 5 Worst Music Magazines and Top 10 Ways to Tell if You Don’t Know Anything About Music lists were funny and so true. I had a few music related questions for you guys:

  Do you guys really think Oasis is better than the Beatles?

  If we were basing this answer as if O-W were a pie chart, then cumulatively yes, Old Wizard thinks Oasis is better than the Beatles. HOWEVER, I am DestructoMaximo, and although a minority here at OW, I believe that the Beatles are the greatest band ever. Take away the fissionability, the suits, the hair, the lunchboxes, and even the star power of each member individually, and you are left with the greatest albums (IMnsHO) of all time. Leaving the fanaticism and glory of Sgt Pepper alone, you can take the white album or Abbey Road and place them up against any album that has come before or after it and it competes, then destroys. The white album is a double LP, but every single song on the album has been my favorite track at one point of my life. The Beatles were seemingly incapable of creating filler, and in my eyes they were the greatest band of all time.

  Would you guys ever write a Top 10 or Top X all time best bands?

  We have attempted to undertake this task several times, but keep in mind it is a matter of opinion. People feel music in their hearts, and their hearts are based on several factors that don’t take statistics into consideration, so it’s all objective. My top 10 bands change daily, so every time we make a list we end up revising it daily. If you were to ask me today, and just me, not OW collectively, it would look like this:

  10. Radiohead
  9. The Black Crows
  8. Modest Mouse
  7. Alice in Chains
  6. Built to Spill
  5. Wilco
  4. Led Zeppelin
  3. The Rolling Stones
  2. Pavement
  1. The Beatles

  ..But that will probably all change by the time you read this.

  What do you guys think about American Idol type shows?

  I think that they are a marketing tool that exposes the sludge of the current American recording industry. They hand pick a voice and a smile, use their own market tested people to mold those voices and smiles, force them to sing time-tested generic songs, dress them in generally accepted clothes, poll the largest focus group in history to see who will move the most records, back them with their own impersonal studio musicians, and then sell them like auditory slaves who are indentured to the industry by their once-in-a-lifetime contracts.

  Why is Sweden ahead of the US on your music countries list?

  The long answer is that we wanted to raise attention toward a mostly culturally forgotten country whose undeniable contributions to pop culture and music are grossly overshadowed by their geographical proximity to the north pole, funny accents, a Muppet, beautiful women, and Viking history. The short answer is: to piss you off.

  And why isn’t Canada on the list (especially ahead of Germany)? You couldn’t even give it an honorable mention ahead of Iceland?! Do you guys like Rush?

  OK, this is a 2 part question. Let me start by saying, no. I do not like Rush. Lee’s voice makes me want rip my ears off. Are they great musicians? Sure, but so am I and I didn’t put the US at #1 because I live here.

  The next question is tough. I think you could argue that every country deserves to be on the list (except for maybe Vatican City and those countries who believe music and dancing is grounds for capitol punishment). Especially now, Canada is pumping out amazing and unique music. Bands like The Arcade Fire and The New Pornographers are rewriting our notions of what pop music can sound like. Plus, I was at Bonhomme last year in Quebec City and I saw some amazing bands from all over Canada that made me think my local scene was lame in comparison…but maybe that was all of the La Fin Du Monde and XXX I was drinking while I was up there (btw, Canadian readers, wtf is in Caribou? The drink, not the animal. It’s like Canadian Absinthe!).

  Do you guys ever listen to any Asian music?

  Sadly, the only Asian music I have heard it the Asian music that gets brought to the states as a novelty. Pizzicato 5 was a favorite of mine in this category. Truth be told, Americans do not get very many musical imports (that they aren’t sort-of making fun of). The most Asian music I’ve listened to was in France, when I shared a room at EM Lyon with 2 Lebanese kids.
  
  Thanks, guys. I love your site. Keep doing music articles no matter what anyone says.

  Thank you! ~DM

17 Comments

1. #1 Gyb says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 10:22 am

   DM: The Beatles can’t do lyrics, they only do rhymes.

   (But when they are serious at that, they are making really “unclear” lyrics like in “Eleanor Rigby”)
2. #2 The Mountain says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 2:34 pm

   The Beatles are for girls
3. #3 DM says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 4:07 pm

   @gyb:

   Lots of times you’re right. One of the points quoted many times was that John and Paul relied heavily on the sound and feel of the words in the context of the music, not just the words themselves. If you look at george, on the other hand, you can take while my guitar gently weeps alone and walk away with desolation and a global empathy.
4. #4 The Mountain says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 4:44 pm

   Global Empathy? What, are you the gay guy of Old Wizard or something?
5. #5 DM says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 4:57 pm

   MTn:

   you’ve got some serious masculinity issues. Usually the people deepest in the closet are the first ones to question others’ preferance. And yes, if we’re going to wax on the poetic relavance of lyrics I will absolutely say things like “global empathy” “i look at the world and I notice it’s turning,” but as you said, the beatles are for girls. Why don’t you enlighten us with the MANLY music you listen to?
6. #6 The Mountain says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 5:32 pm

   Oasis!
7. #7 Matt says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 11:11 pm

   IMHO, the Beatles are most definitely the best band of all time by several different standards.

   Best Songs/Songwriting- Whether you’re talking about pop tunes like “I want to hold your hand”, more progressive stuff (”Strawberry Fields Forever”), or just plain well written songs (”Eleanor Rigby”, “Blackbird”, “A Day in the Life”, the list goes on and on), Beatles win.

   Best Albums- Look at generally accepted lists of the top ten albums of all time. You will most certainly find Sgt. Pepper’s and Revolver in there. You may find Rubber Soul. Even if you listen to the Beatles worst albums (maybe Let it Be or Magical Mystery Tour), you will still find amazing stuff. Beatles win.

   Popularity- Has anything ever matched Beatlemania? Heck, they were so popular that they didn’t play live for the last half of their career. I imagine all of the mobs of girls chasing after them got old after a while. Beatles win.

   Musicianship- Well, this is the only one that I think that the Beatles would lose. However, if musicianship is the only measure of a great band then I guess Dragonforce is the greatest band of all time.

   All this is only my two cents though.
8. #8 Ronnie Wiggtails says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 8:18 am

   The Beatles had giant vaginas. Oasis has medium sized ones. It’s pretty obvious which holds more water
9. #9 Gyb says:
   November 20th, 2009 at 9:15 am

   DM: You’re right, “While My Guitar Gently Weeps”, “Something”, “I Want To Tell You”, the satire “Taxman” and “Piggies”, “Here Comes the Sun”, “Blue Jay Way”, “Love You To” are some of his works. In my opinion, “Something” almost blows any other songs in Abbey Road.
10. #10 Gyb says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 9:18 am

    Matt: “Magical Mystery Tour” is awesome, man! Oh yes, also one thing that made Beatles win (in my very humble opinion), is how difficult I choose which is my personal favourite…Heh…:D
11. #11 Kyle says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 3:36 pm

    The Beatles rule. While perhaps not everyone’s favorite band, if you don’t like them, you probably have bad taste in music. All the members’ different styles came together to create a glue of cohesiveness yet variance at some times as well. Perfect example of this is the varying styles of John and Paul, well- represented with “A Day in the Life”. Also, what’s The Mountain’s deal? If you think saying “global empathy” is gay, you obviously need to expand your vocabulary and overall philosophies about your existence.
12. #12 The Mountain says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 3:57 pm

    haha… You guys are too much. I’ll just go through it the easiest way possible.

    “Generally accepted lists”
    “Something ALways blows my mind”
    “The Beatles rule”
    “Glue of cohesiveness yet variance at some times”

    Did everyone who commented on here have a family member who worked for that anthology picture book of theirs? Does everyone on here hold languid and harangued opinions on art that is most popularly accepted?

    Ok, lets try this one!

    Lets defend…hmm…”ABC”!, or how a bout “Wizard”, or how a bout The Vandellas?

    uhh…no mass media picture books on them with general “blow my mind” phrases from them. Probably no defense of them…whatever “The Beatles Rule”!. Yeah!
13. #13 Kyle says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 5:09 pm

    Glad you agree! Yeah!
14. #14 DM says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 7:12 pm

    @The Mountain

    Yeah dude, my Pavement @ #2 is definitely generally accepted as fact. I couldn’t have picked a more obvious choice. Thanks for the trolling though…
15. #15 The Mountain says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 9:56 pm

    Putting a well-known indie band after the most popular band of all time doesn’t qualify one as not following “generally accepted lists”; if anything it shows a deeper sense of wanting to be original in telling people about their own music taste. Refer to Jack Blacks line in Hi-Fidelity when John Kusak names off his top 5 songs of all time and you will know what I mean.

    I can like a popular band and an odd (but still populary recognized) band at the same time! It’s just a show.

    Tell me something new. SHOW me something new and you’re musical opinion will gain more validity. If not, well then you like The Beatles and Pavement (yawwwnnnnnn)
16. #16 Gyb says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 11:57 pm

    I like The Beatles and The Smiths.

    Chill out, dude. That’s why I said that Beatles is one of my “personal” (in other words, subjective) favourite, only because their songs covered my childhood and teenage memories, just like Mario and Sonic to old-school gamers.
17. #17 DM says:
    November 20th, 2009 at 1:17 am

    Hahaha. Oasis boy. You have my interest in this debate, but I stand by my list…ESPECIALLY seeing as I went out of my way to state that the list was MINE, not even taking responsibility for the other OWs. I also stated that the list was of that moment. There are days where I listen to nothing except Exile on main st all day long over and over, and there are other days where it’s Overcast and Snapcase, seven years dust, It could be an indie rock day, full of pavement, andrew bird, daniel johnston, and neutral milk hotel. Some days are jazz days cluttered with mingus, medeski, miles, and other alliterative jazzers. I’m in too close of proximity to Brooklyn to give a shit about what band is the newest or most unknown, and I could DEFINITELY not care any less about what you think about my musical tastes, although I am interested in YOUR musical tastes. I gave my opinions, I have nothing to prove, you show me something new, besides trumping Oasis and then running your mouth off on a message board. be productive, dude. Teach me. Show me your magical ways, now that you have my attention.