• Doomsday!

  

  Written by bug 5 Comments
  Last Updated:: February 26, 2008

  Jesus Christos! Corpus Christi!

  It is official; the Norwegian government has excavated the former apartment / love nest of Superman, and is now using it to store seeds.

  No, not those kinds of seeds. That’s in Holland. It’s all the same continent though. Anyways, reports from around the world indicate that the Norwegian government financed the construction of the “Doomsday Vault” in order to fill the space with seed collections from around the world. It was done at the bare bones price of about 9.4 million American greenbacks.

  The “vault” itself has been built into the side of a mountain that borders the North Pole. The storage space will be serving as the ultimate safety net against any type of human errors, such as war and poverty. It will also work great against world-wide crop changes, effects of globalization, global warming, and any other natural disaster.

  So far, over a million seeds have been placed in the 427 foot deep icy chamber, with the hope that they may never be needed in an uncertain future. The United Nations also played a roll in the operation since 2004 by supplying much needed funding to the project, in order to promote crop diversity. The majority of the seeds are from plants that sustain global food supplies. There have also been calls for other types of plant life as well.

  This is not the first project of its kind, as there is a similar seed bank in Sussex, England. Not to mention the unknown paranoid billion/multi-millionaires out there who have constructed their own Doomsday survival chambers. For when the day comes that the seas boil and the heavens fall those guys will be ready with a year supply of Dinty Moore stew and Easy-Mac. Plus, the US Government certified duct-tape and plastic wrap.

  Rest assured the original Doomsday is still strapped to that meteor and hurtling through space so he won’t be threatening our global food supplies. Thanks again Superman. Or was it The Eradicator?

  For more information, type “Norwegian Doomsday Vault” into your favorite search-engine. Read.

5 Comments

1. #1 Alberto says:
   March 19th, 2010 at 6:03 pm

   This is like that vault the church of scietology built to safe guard all the scripts of L Ron Hubbard.

   Personally I think is smart to have a Doomsday safe, IF earth is dying in a conventional way. Otherwise is just a waste of money and resources. WHY? You might ask. Well lets see

   IF earth gets destroyed by non-conventinal ways (meteorite, comet, nova explosion and all those type of cosmic treats)We are fuck. It does not matter how strong or resistant the doomsday safe is. IT WILL NEVER BE ENOUGH, for this type of disaster.
   So duck and cover all you want kids, at this level of Power, We are nothing but bacteria
2. #2 Delta says:
   March 19th, 2010 at 11:10 pm

   Actually Alberto, a meteor crashing into us can be a Doomsday scenario without killing the entire population, immediately, and destroying the Earth. It can cause the equivalent of nuclear winter. That would be a Doomsday scenario. But it wouldn’t kill all of humanity.

   Also, a nuclear war is still quite possible, despite the Cold War being over. They can just re-aim the strategic nukes quite easily and quickly back to the U.S. or Russia, and it’s shockingly and disturbingly easy for a nuclear war to start from simple mistakes. On more than one occasion, the U.S. nearly attacked the Soviet Union due to confusions, including one accident involving a program for training somehow getting on the main viewing board and they thought the U.S. had actually been attacked. Fortunately they realized the mistake before retaliating to…..nothing.

   And take into account, that, last I heard, relations between the U.S. and Russia were actually worse than they were during the Cold War.
3. #3 Alberto says:
   March 19th, 2010 at 3:20 pm

   I’m not saying that it would work in a convetional man made doomsday scenario. This Doomsday boxes would work “perfectly” in theory.

   I mean out of space treats, when I reffer to a meteor I meant a huge ass meteor, not Texas size, but bigger, What about Asia size. I don’t know if there is one that size, but considering the size of the universe, most likely there is.

   So, yes, We can survive, this planet extincion scenarios and the “box” is perfect for that.
   But what about planet destruction scenarios, the box will be utterlly crap, against this force.
   and unfortunetelly, there is lot of crap out there, that We don’t even know.

   Russia- US relations are crap, even worse now, that China is realizing military exercises with Russia.

   You just have to see the positive side of it.

   If this shit goes down, you’ll get to “play” Fallout3 in real life.
4. #4 Delta says:
   March 19th, 2010 at 3:31 pm

   um I’m thinking if there was a meteorite the size of Asia, that it’d have a very good chance of being seen long before it was close enough to be quite dangerous.
5. #5 Alberto says:
   March 19th, 2010 at 7:38 pm

   Let’s say that there is a meteor the size of Asia , and that We see it, coming towards earth.
   What Can We do to stop this size of Meteorite?
   Sure We can try to Nuke the hell out if it, but it will really move it out of it’s pat? Maybe, maybe not.
   I heard when I was on middle school, that someone made a scale detonation af an H-BOMB and according to the scale detonation, it moved earth out of it;s orbit. Now this is what I heard. It does not mean is true.

   But lets say a huge comet is coming towards earth, what the hell can We do? Even if We have 1 year of preparation. is either We move earth out of the way or We destroy that huge ass comet. Either one, seems really unlikelly.

   I rather live with the A-boms, duck and cover and play Fallout 3 in 3-D