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  • Top 10 Worst Types of Music Fans

    old-wizard.com
    Written by Zeromage 53 Comments
    Last Updated:: September 25, 2009

    The music fan has the most deleterious effect on the music they want to represent.  They can bring good music down to the worst music in the blink of an eye.  It’s hard to be open to style of music when you go to a show for the first time and have to endure these buffoons who take the culture behind the music and give it an excess it’s not in need of.  Sometimes it’s just the fans fault, but most of the time it’s the music genre that spawns these identity thieves.  The fans of these next genres are noticeable, leading to the sense that the genres are idealized over the substance.  It’s with a hint of nausea that one will pursue these shows enduring the crowd while trying to actually listen to the music, unless of course you want to be part of the crowd, the crowd that defines the band, rather than the other way around.

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    • Top 10 Guitarists of All Time

      old-wizard.com
      Written by Zeromage 126 Comments
      Last Updated:: September 9, 2009

      Old-Wizard’s Top 10 Guitarists of all time will not be your traditional Top  Ten  Guitarists of all time list. There won’t be obvious choices on here. Just because a guitarist can wank to no end doesn’t mean anything to us here at Old-Wizard. We could go into a guitar shop, turn on a Marshall Stack, plug in any guitar, and sound like we’re good wankers. So fuck the Stevie Ray Vaughn’s and Eric Clapton’s with their boring ass blues wanking. This list isn’t for the old farts whose conception of good guitar playing is limited to the most banal modes of style. This list of the more adventurous at heart who don’t hear just plain technical musicianship, but aesthetically pleasing sounding styles and innovative work that influenced guitarist past their own records. Certainly there was a history of guitar after the Blues. This list’s focus is on those great guitarists who did something else with the guitar.

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      • Top 10 Overrated Songwriters

        old-wizard.com
        Written by Zeromage 93 Comments
        Last Updated:: September 3, 2009

        Overrated Songwriters are a dime a dozen. Usually these songwriters are in a band that’s considered good (which means publicly covered in any way shape or form). These bands usually suck too because of the poor songwriter. Regardless, along with the band appearing as quality comes the harangues on why the songwriter is brilliant. The reasons for songwriting greatness is scarce when defined by anyone who goes off on these tangents. Relying on expressible gestures, these “music enthusiastic” appear more as monkeys than a more appropriate stoic gesture that conveys a tacit understanding of quality. These next songwriters are marks of men (and one female) who often arouse these identity masturbations. These songwriters are all generally considered as great songwriters, but a closer look at these songwriters will hopefully relegate the “music enthusiasts” gestures to the scrap heap.

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        • Top 10 Underrated Songs

          old-wizard.com
          Written by Zeromage 32 Comments
          Last Updated:: August 27, 2009

          We just made the ultimate Top 10 Most Overrated Songs of all time list, so it seemed fitting to do a Top 10 Underrated Songs list. As always, it’s a list; of what we think are the most underrated songs ever of all time, this time around. The usual suspects are on this list. Maybe a couple new ones are on here for you to check out. Maybe even a couple of new bands are on here for you the check out that might become your favorite band after listening to them. Then you can tell everyone that you learned of them from Old-Wizard, and maybe even buy one of our T-shirts where we list the Top 10 underrated Songs of all time on it. Basically, we just want you to make us popular.

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          • Top 10 Shoegazing Songs

            old-wizard.com
            Written by Zeromage 71 Comments
            Last Updated:: August 14, 2009

            What happens when you take the production of Phil Spector, drench in pyschadelic 60’s reverb and match it with breathy and harmonious vocal melodies all done in a seemingly effortless fashion? You get the grandiose genre of Shoegazing that has been one of Pop’s best subgenres in it’s history. The original impulse for these creative masterpieces came from many different places. With Kevin Shields in My Bloody Valentine it came from wondering what it would sound like to put 50 Marshall stacks in one room and have a guitar connected to all of them with 5-10 different delays and reverbs pedals going. For Andy Bell formerly of Ride it came from an epiphany one day listening to The Beatles with a loud fan on. Combining the over layered fan with the melodies he heard on the radio gave him an impulse for noise and melody. Wherever the creative impulse came from, it always seemed to work in creating new musical experiences upon every listen.

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            • Top 10 Reasons British Music is Better Than American Music

              old-wizard.com
              Written by Zeromage 162 Comments
              Last Updated:: August 7, 2009

              usa_uk_flagNot many people understand that British music is better than American music.  They don’t understand this because of the political hegemony that America occupies in the West and “The Blues”.  It’s time to dig out the reasons why British music has always been better than American music.  It’s obvious to us here at Old-Wizard, and has been since we started getting into music and realizing the patent difference in quality between the two countries.  Hopefully this list will only act as a preface to one’s actions of going back through the great music that the British made and realizing where the quality is.  If all else fails, then one will just be in a position of admitting that they have bad taste in music.
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              • Top 5 Reasons Indie Music is So Bad

                old-wizard.com
                Written by Zeromage 48 Comments
                Last Updated:: July 31, 2009

                As any of the music readers of Old-Wizard know, indie music is our enemy.  It was listed as the worst music genre of all time on our recent list “Top 10 Worst Music Genres of all Time”.  That’s some position to have over and above Mainstream Country and even the Nickelback genre!  Indie music worse than Nickelback?  Surely you must be joking.  Not really.  Both are quantifiably bad but indie music takes the prize as worst genre because of how many people think the music is good.  Nickelback was saved by most people knowing they’re shit.  Here then is why indie music is the worst music genre of all time.
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                • Top 10 Most Important Bands Since Oasis

                  old-wizard.com
                  Written by Zeromage 115 Comments
                  Last Updated:: July 22, 2009

                  If hasn’t be objectively and empirically proved already by Old-Wizard, then we will just categorically state right now that Oasis is the greatest band of all time. Any argument against this claim has been refuted by the Old-Wizard staff and our recent neophytes. Our position is also held by the post-Oasis bands that have made landmark albums after them. Oasis’s influence on these bands is undoubted if not outright expressed in interviews. In this list we will go through these bands and list them as the most important bands since Oasis. If Oasis was the most important band of all time, then certainly the most important bands after them would logically have to be influenced by them. This list will define the most important ones though in a very definite order of importance.

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                  • Top 10 Country Songs For People Who Don’t Like Country

                    old-wizard.com
                    Written by Zeromage 39 Comments
                    Last Updated:: July 16, 2009

                    This isn’t your grandfather’s best of country list, this isn’t even your father’s best of country list, unless your father was cool. This list is Old-Wizard’s best of country list, which means it’s a list of opinions masquerading as objective fact. You probably haven’t heard of most of these songs, but they are the best country songs of all time regardless. The focus of this list was more on a genre that was innovative with country music rather than traditional country music that was satisfied in it’s traditional and literal meanings that spoke to only the most obvious listeners. The term for this genre (we are focusing on) is often cited as “(alt)ernative-country”, but that tag is inaccurate for many of the songs on this list. Hopefully there will be more of an appreciation of the country genre after people take a listen to these songs and realize that country need not be limited to Garth Brooks and that other Australian waffle with the dyed blonde hair.

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                    • Top 10 Oasis Songs

                      old-wizard.com
                      Written by Zeromage 87 Comments
                      Last Updated:: June 25, 2009

                      Making a best of Oasis list with only 10 of their songs on it is difficult for us here at Old-Wizard. A Top 100 would probably be difficult for us. We think every song they ever wrote was at least good. The proof is in the pudding. Look at this band’s b-sides and you will see the inordinate amount of quality songwriting possessed in the genius of Noel Gallagher. This attempt at putting together the top 10 Oasis songs should be seen as a preliminary attempt at an impossible task. Yes, this is how good we think Oasis are. You have a problem with that? Just make sure Be Here Now isn’t playing on the jukebox or you’ll be done.
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