• Ask Old-Wizard: May 24th, 2008

  

  Written by Zeromage 5 Comments
  Last Updated:: May 24, 2008

  I’m back. Back from the future. And I’m taking “Ask Old-Wizard” to the future, and beyond. This week I answered a few questions about the NES, pretentious British music and Kilt etiquette. Hope you enjoy, and be sure to send any questions for Old-Wizard to oldwizard.com@gmail.com.

  Alex asks, I just got my NES and one out my two controllers doesn’t work. Actually, the A, B, select, etc. buttons work but it’s the d-pad. How can I fix this?

  The solution is simple: don’t use the d-pad. There are plenty of games out there that don’t require choosing a direction all the time, and let’s be honest, those that do aren’t really all that fun. Too many decisions; forward, backwards, up, down, who has the time? Not me thats for sure. Of course like most people you could simply buy a new controller. That would most likely solve the problem.

  Tony asks, I have the Super Mario Bros./Duck Hunt cartridge but I lack a zapper. I want to buy one on ebay, but not by itself. If I want to buy it bundled with a different zapper game, what game should I look for?

  Gunsmoke. Most underrated game ever for Nintendo.

  Adam asks, Can the SNES play NES games?

  A little known fact is that the answer to this question is yes, and here’s how; First you’ll need a couple of things, a screw driver, wire hanger, some low grade phosphoric acid, and wire cutters. Take the acid and pour it on the cover of your NES game, this will melt the plastic allowing access to the board inside. Next take the screw driver and poke at it a few times, just randomly. Finally take the wire hanger and stick one end in an electric socket and the other end in the cartridge slot in your SNES leaving room for your NES cartridge. Now jam the NES cartridge in backwards and viola you have your self an NES game playing on an SNES. Be careful though this process is dangerous and should be done in a well ventilated and well grounded place. Good luck. Disclaimer

  What were the wire cutters for? Actually I don’t know, but the process won’t work without them.

  

  Evan asks, Are there any side projects from Oasis members?

  Yes, there are tons but Noel won’t let any of them see the light of day for fear of them becoming successful.

  Brian asks, Why did you guys leave the Beatles off your top 10 British bands list?

  Because they’re just an old rehash of Oasis

  Scott asks, Who would win in a fight between Spiderman and Darth Vader?

  Darth Vader. He has a deeper voice.

  Kevin asks, I am going to a wedding this summer. Would it be appropriate if I wore a kilt?

  Only if you’re wearing your real clan colors.

5 Comments

1. #1 the REAL zeromage says:
   March 17th, 2010 at 5:08 pm

   UGGHHHHHHH… this guy again. He’s such an idiot. I hate this stupid website more than anything including childhood diabetes.
2. #2 Bug says:
   March 17th, 2010 at 12:58 am

   Amazing. Your insight is worth more than a bowl full of golden lucky charms. With skim milk.
3. #3 BillyBoy says:
   March 17th, 2010 at 7:05 am

   If we took this battle of superheroes and put it on some lone planet somewhere far away from earth would Thor, your number 1, even make the list?
4. #4 Delta says:
   March 17th, 2010 at 8:04 am

   What the Hell are you doing asking that question on here, BillyBoy? This article isn’t even comic related, with the exception of one question regarding a fight between Spider-Man and Darth Vader. Which obviously isn’t even serious, saying Vader would win because his balls have dropped and Peter Parker’s hasn’t.
5. #5 alberto says:
   March 17th, 2010 at 3:02 pm

   Will I ever have Superpowers?